|
. |
Season’s Greetings 2000 (A year letter to my friends)
Excuse me for using English, but it makes it all so much simpler: otherwise I should write to you in Finnish, Swedish, French, German and English. I have habitually sent you Christmas Cards (not always!) but this year I thought I’ll send you e-mail instead. So you will not only know that I (we) am thinking on you, but also you will get to know something more. I am a very bad telephone user and ordinary letter writer, but in e-mail I am still active (of course we’ll soon be all submerged under unwanted e-mail and will have to find better solutions, but the time has not quite come yet). Your are practically all people towards which my first thought is that of remorse that I have not kept in touch, have not been communicating regularly. But you should know that you are also people, who come to mind when I think that I have nice and good friends all over the world. Whom I would like to see more often! Well, what should I tell you? First of all, as you all should know, I am a strong supporter of advanced technology and means of communication, so you will find quite a lot of material on my website (www.valt.helsinki.fi/staff/jproos): all my recent and not so recent texts, even a book, autobiographical materials, hobbies, photographs of the family, letters to the editor, as well as CV and bibliography. There is even a diary of one day, the international diary day a year ago (sorry, only in Finnish!). Much if this is, unfortunately only in Finnish or Swedish, but quite a lot also in English. Soon I will have to put in a search engine so that you will find more easily all relevant materials. But the structure is still very simple so you should be able to find what you want. Essentially my website gives you a pretty complete picture of my interests and activities, at least hints to them. So what is lacking is actually the more private part: what has happened to my family and myself during the past year. The first months of the third millennium were spent in France, Switzerland and Italy: we experienced the Great Storm which left really impressive marks as we trailed its course alongside the Jura mountains all the way to Grand St Bernard. These months were truly enjoyable and useful in many ways. Then we came back to Finland, immersed into work and everyday life, spent the summer quietly in the countryside, and this autumn has been less fun with too much work, minor illnesses, darkness, rain (But September and half of the October were very nice) . And now the climax of more or less hectic activity has come: there are still some meetings, two PhD theses just examined, preparations for Christmas, evening activities etc. In fact, this last third of the year has been pretty chaotic and difficult, especially compared to the previous two thirds. Anna has had much too much to do, and she has been really burdened, which reflects also at home in the children. My relations with Ariel have been rather strained from time to time. So, the fact is, that time spent at work has been often more quiet and peaceful, unfortunately. But I do hope that this will pass and we will with increasing light, real winter, enter a better period. But even now there have been many good moments, memorable occasions, feelings of togetherness and happiness. Ariel, (five on Jan 10th) is essentially a good and intelligent boy, but he has entered a period of bouts of stubbornness and he does not always do what he is asked to do (or not to do), even after ten requests. But after a crisis comes remorse and a decisions not to do the same thing again, till he does the same thing once more. So essentially he intends well. Intellectually he is developing very rapidly, becoming more and more independent, posing intelligent questions, soon learning to read and write (and use the computer) Stella is now what, soon 20 months old (born May 21st), and a really lovable little girl. She does not yet speak (except some words, such as papa, oi oi oi, anna etc) but understands long meanings (both in Finnish and Swedish) and is an extremely secure, independent and calm person. Lately she has had some strange sleeping difficulties, so that she wakes up in the middle of the night and stays up and active 1-2 hours. But even then she lets us sleep mostly, roaming around the house, playing with her toys, reading books (especially the book on African Art from Stella and Austin is very popular). Only now and then does she climb on us and romp joyfully on my stomach. She is still an “easy” child, but very much determined and stubborn, so there is no need to fear that she adapts too much. And she is quite jealous of Ariel, much more than Ariel is of her. To be with her in the morning, when everybody else sleeps (she wakes up almost always at about seven, half past seven, regardless whether she has been awake during the night or not) is truly a moment of happiness and joy, her making these little glad noises and clutching herself to me, from time to time, roaming around the kitchen, taking out everything that can be taken out from the drawers (but never once breaking anything!) The truth is, it must be said, that both children are very much attached to Anna. I am just not such a caring father to whom they could always turn. But when I am alone with them, we’ll manage quite well, usually. And I am happy to say that I am still in touch with Larissa and she assures me that she has not forsaken me, which Joel has, unfortunately done . She is in Florida and this year has gotten nothing but A:s in her college as well as a prize of best poems and best short story (about a very horrible father). I am extremely proud of her and only hope that some day she will decide to come back to Finland where she belongs and could be nearer her brothers and sisters, and father. Anna, the great love of my later life, what about her?. After she finished
her thesis, we all hoped that she could relax and devote herself more to
children and keeping the house a little more in order than it was. But
this was a vain hope (except for a few months in Summer, true) and especially
this autumn has been quite difficult with overlapping timetables and ear
infections etc. The house is if possible even more chaotic than before
(Anna disagrees strongly) and only the fact that every second week a Finnish
(nb!) lady comes to put order in the house, are we able to keep our heads
above the water (or above dust and disorder). The darker it has come, the
more difficult has it become to do the stuff that you are expected to do.
Both at home and at work. We meet very little at work (much more before,
when we had our secret relationship!) But we spend most of our free
time at home together. Which often means that one of us (guess who,
asks Anna) is working or reading and the other one is putting the children
to bed.
Anna’s thesis was finished last year and she defended it in March 31st this year. It is a really good book, which will be justly famous once it is published, and she defended it very well against Michael Burawoy who was her opponent. I was, and am very proud of her: the more difficult the situation the better she fares. And then to myself. As I said, you can check my website for everything I’ve done! There are some interesting articles (those on psychoanalysis are unfortunately not in English), which should interest those who like to know about life stories, generations, love types etc. Otherwise I’ve been doing what I normally do: ski a lot in the winter (last winter about 1200 km), run some (much less) in the summer plus some cycling or skiing on rollerskis. And we have tried to make an old cowshed into a habitable summer cottage in Anna’s parents’ country place, This has meant among other things building somewhat shaky stairs and other wood constructions. I met some of you in the AISLF congress in Quebec in July, which was a very pleasant experience (there are even some photos on my homepage ...) And especially want to thank Elaine Carey Belanger, whose car and apartment I had the pleasure to use. Warm thanks also to Christian Lalive d’Epinay in whose very pleasant home I’ve had the privilege to stay both in January-February and now in December. Daniel Bertaux spent some memorable days in Lapland with us and will hopefully repeat the experience soon. Barbara Laslett, who was present at Anna’s doctoral defense, was also a very welcome friend. One aspect of my activities this year has been preparations for the ESA congress next August (see www.valt.helsinki.fi/esa/helsinki.htm) in the framework of which I hope I will see many of you in Helsinki. I would love to be able to invite all of you to our house, but as it now is, it is possible that we will have no habitable house, but in any case our house is not well suited for large crowds. But you are all welcome and we will put up as many as possible in the house and the University hotel, which some of you know already. But to go back to this, soon to end year, I should say that the greatest events were Anna’s thesis mentioned above, Stella’s one-year birthday (see very fine photos www....jproos / photos.htm) on the home page), some very pleasant skiing events, runs, summer work. Just to mention some more special events: Marcialonga ski race, no snow except on the tracks, rain, but a great atmosphere, the Broloppet run from Copenhagen to Malmo on the new bridge (a singular event with some 100 000 participants), the Course d’Escalade in Geneva, shorter and with less participants but very lively. I am happy to say that in this run I still was able to keep a pace well below 5 minutes/km, which is not too bad for a fat and lazy person that I am nowadays... Intellectually, I don’t think that I’ve achieved anything extremely memorable during the year, but perhaps laid the ground for some important stuff later. Still, the article on Baby boomers (www....jproos/babyboomers.htm) should not be too bad (especially the discovery that positive events are very much age related and there are very few such events after 30, whereas negative events are much more time bound, depending on external events such as economic crises) and I believe that my work on psychoanalysis will also have some effects. There was one big public debate started by me in the leading newspaper,
about how children are being taken in custody in Finland, and this debate
is still continuing. I have written a paper on the problem in Swedish (www...jproos/omhandt.htm)
and will hopefully come up with an English version later. This is a very
serious professional and ethical problem which has important ramifications.
Not one single mistake can be allowed, and unfortunately it seems that
the social workers are unwilling to admit that they have made an error
when this is the case. And the administrative and other courts are not
able to treat these cases with the seriousness and speed they need (if
you take a 5 months old baby in custody, a week is a long time and a month
is an eternity, whereas for the administrative process, a month is the
smallest possible time unit)
So, I hope you recognize me from the text, the rather selfish, a little
complaining, basically honest person that I am. But believe me, I am very
thankful for all of you, and very happy that I can count you as dearly
loved friends (although some of you are also relatives!) How I would like
that there would be some quite natural and spontaneous way in which we
all could meet more often, together or separately, during the year. Perhaps
a virtual university would be the answer!
Back to beginning |